lørdag 13. juni 2009

體罰



上一篇文章的回應討論了父母的體罰,這次說一下自己的經歷。

小時侯不乖被媽媽打的挺多的。一般被打的原因是因為欺負妹妹,正確點說是因為我妹妹哭(完全沒有考慮是誰對誰錯)。一般籐條是她的最佳武器。她打了之後就叫我看着那個籐條痕思過。

其實很多時候我的確是欺負了妹妹的,但也有兩次是她不對。

第一次是早上我和妹妹醒來的時候我媽媽每人送了一份禮物給我們。我得到我最喜歡的足球小將貼紙,而我妹就有萬花筒。我們都很高興,但我媽要我們先去梳洗才能玩。我妹先去,然后到我的時候我妹妹想要我送她一個貼紙,我說等我出來再給。結果當我梳洗完出來的時候她已經把兩個貼紙拿了貼到她身上。我正在跟她理論(在我媽聽起來就像吵架),然後就以破壞家庭和諧的罪名被關進厠所去。貼紙也被撕破了。(那時候我六歲,我妹四歲)

第二次也是差不多,事情有不一樣,是我妹不小心把我從沙灘撿回來的貝殼踩破。最後有又被冠以破壞家庭和諧的罪名關進厠所去。

其實我覺得父母賞罰真的要分明,不能以她是妹妹就每一樣事情都要讓她。這樣只會影響我跟她之間的感情和我對對與錯很執著。

當然另外還會被打的時候就是考試成績不好。但自小成績就不錯的我在這方面被打的機會相對地比較少。



去了挪威之後跟爸爸的相處時間多了。摩擦也多了。其實沒有什么摩擦,基本上是他白生氣。

第一家餐館剛開門之後我爸的脾氣很差,據說是因為壓力很大(到處借了幾十萬才頂了這生意)。但脾氣就從這時候一直變壞。

有一次我在廚房後面寫信回香港,由于不懂一些字,我跑去問媽媽,但這時候我爸衝來說我阻著他們工作。結果他把我信的草稿撕的粉碎。記憶中這是我最後一次用紙寫中文信。(這時候我九歲)

另一次我不小心把餐館的後們鈅匙掉了。其實是我懶,把鈅匙拋到該放的地方,但我撒謊,說我不知道為什么鈅匙不見了。當我爸發現了之後的懲罰是一輪痛罵然後用雙手把一個車輪胎舉起來,用力砸到我的自行車上,重復再重復,直到車變形了。(那時候我十歲,一個月後他買了一個新的自行車給我)

做了他的翻譯之後,被打被罵變正常了。他生氣有時候是因為我不願意幫他翻譯(有些問題我真的問不出口),有時候是回應不是他喜歡的(這不是我所能控製的)

打,並不是打手板。簡單的就是一巴掌打臉。復雜的就像電視裏的自由搏擊一樣,把我推向牆然後拳打腳踢。

又一次我媽跟我妹回香港。留下我去幫我爸做waiter. 那一天很忙,餐館坐滿人,但waiter只有我一個。要一個十四歲的人應付坐滿了的餐館六十多個人。記得那一天做完了之後腿都軟了。
第二天我媽從香港打電話來,我在電話抱怨說餐館太忙了,做不來,很想她快點回來。我媽安慰我說她快回來了,而且我爸也有給我額外零用錢,就叫我忍耐一下。我記得那時候我說了一句“有錢都沒命享啦”,之後我就發現我已經被拖行了。當然拖我的人是我爸。他把我從餐館裏面,經過餐館,一直拖我出門口然後把我推出去。那時候餐館有客人,他們都看到了,但沒有說什么。
我不能立刻回去,但在街上遛達一會之後看到沒有客人就回去。由于人沒有了,該來的懲罰也要來的,拳打腳踢少不了,最怕就是晚上不能回家。這次我爸沒有生氣太久,當天晚上就給了我50塊錢,但沒說什么。他還需要我繼續幫忙,直到我媽回來為止。

我記憶中他打得最厲害得那一次是我爺爺來挪威看我們的時候。那一次他要回去了,是早上八點多的飛機,家離開飛機場三個小時的路,我跟我爸兩點多起牀去。我爸開的車。我跟爺爺聊天。但過了三個多小時到飛機場的時候,我很累,我就問我爸我可不可以不進去送機,在車上等。他很生氣,就把我罵,我只好下車跟他們走。突然間他一回頭,我到現在都不知道究竟他是打哪裏的,但我的確暈倒在車頭蓋上。過了一兩秒後醒來,頭有點痛,但是裏面痛,所以不知道他打哪裏。(各位如果知道打哪裏可以一拳把人打暈的話請告訴我) 如果在家我肯定逃了的。但我沒法逃,接下來還要跟他獨處三個小時的車回家。(那一年我十五歲)

最後一次他打我是因為我要幫他打一個電話去幫他翻譯一些什么的東西,他問了好幾個問題,電話另一端的人都一直說不知道,到最後我爸生氣了就一巴掌打過來。(如果想知道當時情況是怎樣,請參考大時代大結句丁蟹要他的兒子們打電話的那一幕)他最後有跟我道歉,晚上寫了一張紙條貼在水松板上。(其實我不確定是不是他寫的,但疑點的利益歸于被告)(那一年我十五歲,距離離開他去美國留學還有三個月)


經過了那幾年跟他的相處,我的脾氣變的很不好。動不動就跟同學打架。其實體罰真的是有需要的,但也要看打的程度和事前事后的解釋,不能只打而不教。我到現在都不知道我為什么被打。或者我根本沒有錯。

fredag 12. juni 2009

世界变了....

来自东方日报的一段新闻.

10歲童疑遭26歲母虐打
【本報訊】牛頭角揭發虐兒疑案,昨午十二時許,一名姓黃(十歲)男童,在樂華南邨一間小學內,被校方發現他身有傷痕,經教職員查問下,黃童表示早前曾被人用藤條責打,校方獲悉報警,並通知家長到校了解。

警員調查後,以涉嫌襲擊將黃童的姓謝(廿六歲)母親拘捕,期間,有人聲稱「成績唔好,罵吓都唔得呀?」黃童其後在一名女子陪同下,送院治療。


请问这里有没有小时候没有被爸妈打过的人?

onsdag 10. juni 2009

布拉格遊記(2)



The next day we do our main sightseeing. Destinations include the powder tower, the old town, and the castle. Coco had the wrong shoes on so her feet were hurting really bad. We head back in the afternoon back to our hotel area and shop for a pair of shoes for her and my parents decided to do what they love most, shopping, for the rest of the evening while we go back to rest and then go out to take some nice night pictures.



Had we not had the new camera, we wouldn't be able to take these pictures, they are amazing. However, as the sky gets darker, we start having problem to keep the camera stable even with a tripod. I have to say the scenary is better than what we have on the pictures.



By the end of the day, both me and Coco are exhausted, and I am sure my parents are too. However, we did manage to go out for some sightseeing after dark and the pictures are amazing.



søndag 7. juni 2009

感動

看到Roger Federer再台上領獎的一刻,我差點哭了。

Congratulation Roger, you deserve it.

tirsdag 2. juni 2009

søndag 31. mai 2009

布拉格遊記(1)

I just noticed that this is the 100th post in this blog.



Prague,

I haven't heard too much about this place until I heard the song by Jay Chow. The whole idea for this trip was a way to "celebrate" my dad's retirement. I had picked out 7 cities which we can go within a reasonable money and time budget. Towards the end, Moscow, Prague and Madrid came up and Moscow dropped out because it requires visa. Eventually my dad picked Prague and Prague it is. Because I had been super busy the few weeks before the trip so we havn't done much research, but with 5 days and 4 nights there, we can afford to get the info at the hotel and plan our trip with the first day.

We have an afternoon flight so I try to restrain myself from eating too much for lunch because I expect to enjoy a big dinner. Comparing to Norway, food in every country is always better and cheaper.



My usual practice is to get some local currency before the flight in case I can't find any minibank that works with my card at the destination. However, the currency exchange at the airport has just sold out the Czech Crowns and I remember Hana said that it is better to use Euros there, so instead I got myself 200 euros, in 50 euro bills, plus I have some euros from before so I believe it should be enough.



The flight is only half full so the 4 of us occupied 6 seats and it gave us a lot of room to move around. Since my previous two trips were domestic flights to Bergen that were 100% filled, I really appreciate the empty seats. Two hours later we arrived at Prague and the first objective is to secure the transportation to the hotel. I remembered from wiki travel that taxis are known for ripping people off, so I am trying to look for some alternatives. It turns out that there are several vans parked behind the taxis that are used to transport people to hotels from the airport, they are privately own and is actually not much cheaper (as I later found out, since I took taxi to the airport on my way home). The most annoying part is that they have 8 seats in the van and they wouldn't just drive with the 4 of us, insisting to fill the van as much as possible. After 10 min of waiting I told the driver that I will only wait 10 more minutes, and if he still don't drive, then we will take taxi instead. Somehow he managed to find 2 more tourists before the deadline and off we go.

It cost 480 kc for the trip between 1 to 4 people, since I only got 440 kc from 20 euros in the airport, I naturally pulled out the 50 Euro bill, and the driver looked so surprised and cannot offer me change, asking me if I have anything smaller. So at the end, I gave him all my kc in my waller plus a 2 euro coin. He drove off happily.



After settling down in the hotel, it is time for dinner and it happens to be a restaurant close by which serve some Czech cusines, and we decided to check it out. My eyes were glowing when I saw the meny, there are many meat dishes and the price is so cheap. The amount that was writting on the menu are either smaller or equal to the menu I see in Norway, except Czech crowns are worth only about 1/3 as much. So we stuffed ourselves for the price that could only buy me a dinner for 2 at most in Norway.



After dinner we decided to get some rest and get ready for tomorrow.

tirsdag 26. mai 2009

我返黎啦

剛剛從捷克回來,遲D出游記。先分享一下照片。

還記得當初買照相機的時候老婆不斷的勸阻,結果全程大部分時間相機被她霸佔。出來的照片效果真的不錯。

City View from Powder Tower:



教堂:



河邊夜景:


廣場夜景:


地鐵站:


皇宮旁邊教堂的頂部:


Panoramic view: (with Olympus stylus1020)

onsdag 20. mai 2009

潜水中

真的很久没有出Post, 之前想讲一下挪威国庆, 但由于没有好的照片, 只能等等.

最近忙什么?

去了读Course, 是.NET的, 一共五天.
然后五月十七是挪威的国庆节, 但也是餐馆一年最忙的一天, 幸好自己的一双腿还在.

然后又要去出差, 这次跟父母一起, 这里(BERGEN)住了一个我爸的旧朋友, 久别重逢, 开心.

星期四挪威放假, 放什么不知道, 但打算去上班, 然后星期五才放假.

星期五下午就去捷克的布拉格, 五天四夜, 行程还没定好.

接下来得好好工作了.

fredag 8. mai 2009

Letter to my wife

Dear wife,
I am happy to hear that you are studying diligently during my trip away. In fact, you have been studying very diligently the whole time. Norwegian is a totally new language to you and for people like us who are not born in a latin language based country, the process of learning Norwegian could be long and boring.

Is there something I can do to help? I know that my temper isn't exactly the best, especially when I am teaching you Norwegian, so I am happy that since my mom has arrived, she had taken over my role and becoming your tutor. Seeing you two learning together, although my face doesn't show it, I am really happy. I have told myself to be patient and I know you will master the language someday. Therefore all I can do at this moment is wait.

Remember how I told you that you are not in a hurry to learn the language? Because I am perfectly capable of supporting this family with my jobs. As long as I am capable of working, you, my parents, and even our future babies will not have to worry about living expenses. It is true, and it will always be true, because it is my job to put a roof above our heads and put food on the table.

However, my dear, our lives would be so much better if we both are working. There are many more dreams and goals that we can reach if we both have our career. Although I am perfectly happy about the way things are right now with our married life and my personal life, I have to say there are so many more ways to improve. For example, you have always want to have more privacy, we could use a bigger house with multiple floors so that we can have more privacy. We would also want to be able to retire early and the best way to do it is to put money aside now and let it grow in various investments. We could also appease your parents since they believe you should be achieving something with your master degree in Law.

My dear, I am glad that you are studying so hard right now, but I have to point it out to you that there is a major difference between studying a language and studying in university. There is also a big difference in learning a Latin-based language and learning Chinese. You should really learn the alphabets by heart so that you can learn to pronounce the words even if you don't know the words. When you can speak the word well, people can understand you better and that's when the doors of opportunities open. Yes, the grammar is important, but being able to speak the language is far more important. So please keep this in mind when you plan your study ahead. When you have finally learned enough Norwegian to carry a normal conversation with people, we will be able to realize a lot of our dreams and create a better future.

I can't wait to go back home tonight, I miss you a lot.

Love

Your hubby.

Erik

torsdag 7. mai 2009

出差记

I am writing this post as I am sitting at my hotelroom in Bergen, the second largest city in Norway. The reason I am here is really because I am starting my process of learning .NET and the system architect of my mother company have a day free to walk me through some design patterns and some basic .NET programming. Plus I have a couple of meetings with my team members and it is just convenient to stay one more day to meet with him face to face instead of over the speakerphone.

It has been quite eventful so far. The flight was booked for 7:15am and I had to wake up at 5:30 to make sure I can arrive at the airport with 30 minutes to spare which is more than enough for domestic flights. Just as I was about to leave my apartment at 6 I got an SMS from the airline saying that my flight is cancelled, and instead I was automatically booked for the next flight which leaves at 8:00. That plane will arrive at Bergen at 8:55 and I will only have 20 minutes to get to the office before the workshop begins. Well, I didn't really have a choice...

So I board that plane, and it landed 5 minutes early which gave me some room to work with. I forgot to mention that my boss is also going to Bergen today and we happened to book the same flight originally, since our flight was cancelled I assumed he ended up in the same flight as me, but I was wrong. I couldn't see him on the plane and I couldn't find him in the terminal. At first I just want to share a taxi with him to the office, but I guess we just have to go separately.

I got to the office at exactly 9:15am and I was overjoyed, so I paid and jump out of the taxi and up to the office, greeted the system architect and get ready to start the day, just as I reach for my notebook I realize that I left my laptop at the taxi. So I have to call the taxi station to get a hold of the driver and tell him to come back with my laptop. Luckily I have the receipt so I was able to tell them who the driver was, otherwise it will take a long time to search for that driver (of course I have to save the receipt, that's the only way to claim the money back). As I was waiting for the laptop to come back my boss walked in. It turned out that he was not automatically booked to the next flight because he refused to use the company's travel pass (instead using his own frequent flyer program), have to sneak away before he realize how stupid he was.

My laptop eventually got delivered to me after 10 minutes or so and the day begins. Overall the day was very informative and I learned a lot. I am just surprised the coffee managed to keep me awake.

As I left the office, it's actually not raining so I have to use this chance to checkout the town (Bergen is known to rain/snow 200 days a year). So instead of taking the taxi to the hotel, I walked (4km). I took some nice pictures along the way which I will put up when I get back.

I didn't really looked at the hotel reservation until I got to the hotel and I found out that my hotel stay costs 2050NOK (about 2500 HKD) (I guess HK's 平机会主席 should feel better now.). Plus the plane ticket which costs about 3000, this trip actually cost them 5000. On top of that they sent me to a .NET course next week, the total come up to be 25000 NOK. I guess it is all worth it if they can finally put me into use.

It's 18:20 and I am dead tired. I think I am going to bed now even though the sun is still high up and it doesn't get dark until 9:45pm in Norway nowadays.

Good night.